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Monday, August 19, 2019
My Favorite Kind of Vague :: Personal Narrative Jealousy Envy Essays
My Favorite Kind of Vague When dreams mix with realities itââ¬â¢s 2 oââ¬â¢clock on a Sunday morning, and no one is awake but you, scribbling on a notebook pad behind the bathroom door, trying to grasp how something so mild, how heartwarming, could be converted by its counterpart. I read this book last summer, it was required reading, everyone told me it was horrible. The book takes place in the south at this boyââ¬â¢s boarding school called Devon during the summer session, in it Gene, this guy with a terrible sense of self and an even worse self-esteem, engages in a codependent relationship with the magnificent athlete Phineas. Everyone loves Finny, heââ¬â¢s charming, heââ¬â¢s naive, heââ¬â¢s everything Gene isnââ¬â¢t. So anyway, Gene is jealous of Phineas, although theyââ¬â¢re best friends, so he develops this concept of Finny being jealous of him, justifying the hatred he develops for him. It becomes apparent that Phineas isnââ¬â¢t at all jealous; Geneââ¬â¢s, consumed with envy, and pushes Finny out of the tree they used to jump out of together, essentially killing his best friend. Itââ¬â¢s strange how literary life parallels life so perfectly sometimes. But it really is a good book, I recommend it. But who am ââ¬Å"Iâ⬠? Well, allow me to introduce myself. Iââ¬â¢m Beth. Some may accuse me of being antisocial, but Iââ¬â¢m not. I mean, sure, I get calls all the time, but theyââ¬â¢re for homework help and advice on weak poetry. Itââ¬â¢s not that I mind it; itââ¬â¢s just that I donââ¬â¢t exactly enjoy it. When I was in seventh grade, I cracked a book open at my fatherââ¬â¢s library, you should probably know heââ¬â¢s a librarian. It was called ââ¬Å"Popularity in 100 steps.â⬠I remember a few guidelines from it ââ¬Å"Be nice to others,â⬠that means listening to them, and giving good advice another was ââ¬Å"Try not to be pessimistic,â⬠another ââ¬Å"Use your fashion senseâ⬠and then the big 100 was ââ¬Å"Be yourself.â⬠Well, Iââ¬â¢d been being myself for 16 godforsaken years, and it was time for a change. I met her in a hallway, at the time squirming at her singing, her faà §ade of giddiness. She could have authored the awe-inspiring ââ¬Å"Popularity in 100 steps,â⬠her life was based around its rules. She was happy then, happier than sheââ¬â¢s ever been since, we hadnââ¬â¢t exchanged words, yet, I was just a nametag, and she was just the ringmaster of a group of 30 boys.
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